Moving On
by Go-Like-An-Arrow
Summary: Her intention had been noble,the outcome was not.Tongues dancing…frantically trying to hit the bed before they fell…the way his skin felt against hers.She reached for the other half of the bed.It was cold.How could she have so stupid? REPOSTED
1. The Morning After

_Disclaimer: Not mine, don't sue._

Her head was throbbing. She took a few deep breaths to ward off the dizziness she knew she would feel when she sat up. She was her father's daughter, and thus had a soft spot for alcohol, though she rarely drank. It was more of a love/hate relationship actually.

She wasn't sure what time it was, but the way the sunlight poured through the window panes told her it was late morning. As she came to her senses, she began piecing together the night before. _How 'bout you come to my place? You're in no condition to be alone…_Her intention had been noble, but the outcome was not. _Tongues dancing… frantically trying to hit the bed before they fell… The way his skin felt against hers…Him inside her…_ She closed her eyes and reached for the other half of the bed. It was cold. She looked around the room. His clothes were gone. _How could I have been so stupid? _

She staggered across the room with the sheet wrapped tightly around her, even though she knew she was alone. Before she hit her bedroom door a familiar feeling hit her. Her stomach knotted and bile rose in her throat. She ran to the bathroom and vomited what little she had in her stomach. Finally, the moment passed as she clung to her toilet and tried to recover. On trembling legs she rose and continued her venture. She looked for any sign of him being in her home, but he knew how to dispose of that evidence. He was a CSI after all. He had left nothing behind. Nothing except for her. What had she expected? It was just one night of drunken passion, or anger, or grief. She wasn't sure anymore. To her it had been more, but to him it was just a release. He had just lost his wife, and he was grieving. She was there, a shoulder to cry on. Then it happened. One kiss turned to several, and then their clothes shed their bodies. She was so naïve to believe he really loved her; she was his friend, his colleague, nothing more.

She looked at the clock. She was late for work. Very late. She shoved her emotions down, but they threatened to breach her facade. She compartmentalized well, but she didn't know if she could hide her pain. She had loved him for so long. She watched him date, and marry, but she secretly wished it could be her. Last night had felt so right… to her; this morning a nightmare. He regretted what they had done. How was she going to face him?

_God, Calleigh, suck it up. This never happened. You are a big girl, you can handle this. You have to handle this like a professional. It never happened… _ She took a deep breath and got ready for work.

_A/N: I had to edit the story because I found inconsistencies in my older v. newer material. Just a few minor tweaks. Changed the chapters bit. All good. Thanks for your patients._


	2. Confessions

"Hey Cal," Eric said as he walked into the ballistics lab.

'Hi!" She chirped happily, her eyes never leaving her scope.

"Is everything ok?" Eric knew her too well.

"Everything's great, Eric, why?" Calleigh asked innocently.

"Come on Calleigh, don't lie to me. Something's wrong. You and H are best friends, but you've been avoiding him like the plague all week." Damn, he was way too observant.

"I've just been busy, Eric."

"That's not what this is. The other day you intentionally stayed in a room to avoid passing him in the hall. Come on Cal, talk to me."

"I can't Eric, just let it go." Calleigh looked at him with those big green eyes. The look on his face told her that her broken heart was on display instead of safely hidden away in her chest. Or maybe it was shame. Probably both. She looked away and focused on her scope once again. She couldn't look him in the eye.

"Calleigh, I just want to be here for you. You're one of my closest friends. You can trust me; sometimes it helps to talk about it."

_I'm a slut, that's what's wrong_. Calleigh sighed in resignation. "Saturday, I went to get my dad at the Regala Room. He was there too, tucked away in a corner. I took my dad home and went back to see if he was alright. He started talking about Marisol, so I sat down, like any friend would do. I just stayed there to help him through, I swear, but he was already drunk and I started drinking. In hindsight, it was my fault. I just... We…We were both drunk. It wasn't supposed to happen. I never meant for it to happen." She looked away and shook her head. _Why was she like this?_ "He was gone before I woke up; it was like he had never been there. For a minute, I thought it was a dream." She added in a whisper.

"Cal," Eric reached for her, but she pulled away.

"No, I'm fine Eric; I just can't be around him right now. It's just too weird and it's too hard for me to act like nothing happened. He is making it look so easy."

"I'm always here for you. You know… if you need to talk."

"Thanks Eric, This will get better. It will just take time." She smiled brightly, feeling confident that her heart was once again encased in her body. Hiding her feelings had become her signature move. She couldn't let that change now.


	3. Consequences

_Seven Weeks Later…_

"From the advanced signs of decomp, I'd say he's been here at least four days, but I'll have a better idea after post." Alexx told the two CSI's next to her.

"Oh my god," Calleigh moaned as she quickly left the room.

"Is she okay?" Alexx looked at Eric expectantly.

"I'll go talk to her." He went out to look for his colleague. He found her sitting partially in the Hummer. She was breathing deeply with her eyes closed and her head over her knees. "Calleigh?"

"I'm fine. I think I'm coming down with some kind of virus or something, because my stomach has been tight and I've been nauseous for the past few days. But, I'll be fine. Don't you worry about me now."

"Calleigh, uh… I know it's none of my business, but did you and H… you know…" He sighed at the confused look on her face. "Use… um…protection?" He said awkwardly. If they had been talking about him, the subtly would have been lacking greatly, but this was Calleigh. And this was something no one had expected.

"What?" She was shocked, not so much by the question, but the fact that she didn't know the answer. She wasn't on the pill, she hadn't been seeing anyone serious enough and didn't feel it was worth it. A condom, though? Did they? "Of course we did. I mean, I think we did." She groaned.

"Maybe you should see a doctor."

"I don't think I want to know."

"Well, if you are, it's going to come up eventually."

_Oh my God. What am I going to do?_ Calleigh's breathing quickened and her heart pounded in her chest. Her clothes were a bit tighter, and she hadn't gotten her period yet. _How have I not noticed that?_ For someone so smart, she felt so stupid. _What have I done?_ She felt sick. She felt dirty. She felt scared. "I need to go see my doctor, now."

"Calleigh, you only have three more hours in your shift." Eric argued.

"I have to go right now! Now! Can you cover me and I'll talk to H tomorrow?" She wasn't waiting for his answer. She had adjusted in her seat and she was ready to bail.

"Okay." Eric saw that she was in a complete panic. "What are you going to say to him?"

"That I had to see my doctor. I was sick."

"No I mean…"

"I know what you mean, Eric! I'm not telling him anything."

"Calleigh, you need to tell him."

"That's my decision to make not yours!" She reached for the door. Eric backed up and looked at her. She closed the door and drove off looking like a broken woman. It hurt him to see her like that.

"Miss Duquesne, You are indeed pregnant." The doctor said.

"Are you absolutely sure?"

"Very sure." He saw the look on her face and added, "You have options. You are not very far along. Terminating the pregnancy is still a viable option. Adoption is also an option. If you decide to carry to term you will need to see me or another doctor several times during your pregnancy. Should you choose that route, your next visit will be a sonogram, and you can see your baby."

"Oh my god. This can't be happening." Calleigh said quietly. She was in a daze.

"Miss Duquesne?" The doctor asked and set his hand on her shoulder.

"Fine." She answered simply.

"The nurse will come back in and talk to you about what you can expect and answer any of you questions."

"Thank you, Doctor." For the first time, she looked around her and there was no one. Although she never thought of having children, she was damn sure she shouldn't be in that room alone. No one there to hold her hand, or kiss her forehead, or ask a thousand questions. No, it was just her.


	4. Regrets

Calleigh breathed deeply. _You can do this! You have to do this. Maybe He'll be happy…_ She coached herself.

"Horatio?" Calleigh peeked into his office and knocked on the doorframe.

"Hey Calleigh. How are you feeling? What did the doctor say?"

"I'm feeling alright. I have been thinking…"

"Did it hurt?" He joked.

Calleigh giggled. "No! And this is serious."

"I'm all ears." He closed the file that he had been studying.

"We need to talk about… well, that night a couple months back." She took a deep breath to hold her composure. "It has really been tormenting me, and if you've noticed, things have been weird between us ever since."

"Yes, I have noticed. I'm so sorry Calleigh. I've been thinking a lot about it too." Calleigh breathed a sigh of relief. "It was such a mistake. I never should have put you in that position. We are best friends, and I took advantage of that. Calleigh, I'm truly sorry. I wish it had never happened. I was drunk and upset, and if I could take it all back, I would."

Her words caught in her throat. Her heart dropped into her stomach. Now what would she say? "I agree." She managed to get out. She hated herself. He had thought about Marisol when they made love, not her. She was his regret. Their child was a mistake. How would he take the 'I'm pregnant and you're the father'? She wanted to scream, cry, throw a fit, just do something, but she just sat there doing her best to control the overwhelming need to run to the bathroom and puke.

"Cal, you are my closest friend, my colleague and respect you greatly. I can't believe I ruined that." His words had hurt her; he could see it in her eyes. He hadn't meant to. It never once crossed his mind that their broken friendship would the least of the consequences she faced.

He looked at her with those eyes. She could've have gotten lost in those eyes a few months ago. Now they killed her inside. "You didn't. I could've said no at anytime. I... I didn't." Calleigh tried to reason. "It wasn't just you" _I wanted it. I wanted you._

"I could have stopped too." Horatio added.

"I should go. I have two weeks vacation time, and I'm still a little sick, stress and all. Do you mind if I take it?"

"I wish you wouldn't, but I can't stop you." He smiled sadly at her.

"Thanks." Calleigh got up and left. She stopped at her locker and grabbed her things. She had so much in that locker. She practically lived out of it. She took everything that meant something then headed home.

A/N: Sorry, It's short, but that's just how I write. And I need to drag it out enough to finish. I have the next 4 chapters written, I just need to edit them and then figure out where to go…So I'll try to stay speedy.


	5. Plans

Calleigh sat on her couch and cried. She had always been told that life was unfair, but no one warned her it could be cruel. She pulled herself together and got off the couch. She wasn't hungry, but the nurse said she had to eat. The baby, or fetus, or whatever, was depending on her. She made herself a sandwich and sat down at her computer. She started thinking about her options. Abortion; no, she couldn't do that. She was always pro-choice, but now that is actually affected her, she was damn sure it was wrong. Adoption; She couldn't go through life wondering where her child was, or is it was safe, or if one of bodies she came across was her child's. Keep the baby. It was the only thing to do.

She started typing on the keyboard. She didn't quite know what she was looking for, but it certainly wasn't in Miami. She reached over and picked up her cell phone. Her fingers knew the number without any direction from her brain. She didn't want to call… It was ringing. _Crap._

"Hello?" She heard on the other end of the line.

"Hi Mama," She was trying so hard to be strong, but a mother always knows when her baby is hurting.

"Calleigh, darling, what's wrong?"

"I messed up. Really bad. I don't know what to do; I just have to get out of Miami. I can't be here anymore. It hurts so much here." She began to cry again. She tried so hard to hold it in, but the pain was just too strong.

"Please come home, honey. I miss you, and you said that you want to leave Miami, it think you should…"

"Mama…"

"At least for a visit…" There was a moment of silence, and she knew her daughter could reason that request away easily as she had always done in the past. She just hoped she wouldn't.

"Okay, mom. I'll be there in the next couple of days." Calleigh resigned.

"Thank you! Oh, sweetie, I can't wait to see you."

"Bye, mom."

Calleigh pushed the 'end' button. For the first time she set her hand on her stomach and felt the tiny bump that had risen there. She had a tiny life inside her. A tiny life that she would bring into the world. A tiny life that she would raise. A tiny life that would grow up and leave its own mark on the world. A beautiful little child. She had never been so scared, and yet filled with so much hope. She went to her room to pack.


	6. Worlds Collide

_Fourteen years later-Miami, Florida_

"Horatio, I need a couple days off."

"Of course, Eric. Your date must really be something." He joked.

He laughed. "No, uh… You know Calleigh's dad, Duke? He died yesterday. Liver disease. The funeral is in a few days."

"Really? Send my sympathies." Horatio never sounded that calloused. Calleigh had been a sore subject with Horatio for a long time. She had taken time off and never come back. Eric had been the one to find her apartment gutted of everything personal, with a note that simply said 'I'm so sorry'.

"Horatio, I want you to come with me. This is getting really old. You two need to resolve this."

"We are best friends, but this is no concern of yours."

"She was my best friend too! I know what happened between you! The only thing I don't understand is why she left. So why don't you tell that part, H?" Eric practically yelled at the older man. He had aged well; his red hair was now peppered with silver. He never lost the silent command he had always held over those around him.

"She told you what happened?"

"She told me that the two of you screwed after she found you drunk. Yes!"

"Did she tell you anything else?"

"Like what?"

"I also told her I regretted it. If I had it all to do again, I would have sent her home from the bar alone."

"You did what? I've never been this shocked by your honesty."

"What do you mean?"

"You know that doctor appointment that she had? Yeah, she was seeing if se was pregnant! She didn't say anything?"

"That's what she wanted to talk about." Horatio finally understood. "The timeline…How could I not have connected it? I have a child?"

"You might. I never found out. Even if she did, who says she kept it? Either way, you need to talk to her."

"Oh my god. I never went after her."

"I have two tickets to Louisiana, leaving tomorrow. Be there."

Horatio just nodded, still in shock.

_Meanwhile… about 1170 miles away… Calleigh was preparing for her father's funeral. Eric and her mother would be staying in her home, while her brothers and other family would be in the hotel in town. Her daughters dealt with the loss of their grandfather by fighting. _

"Kelsey, you are such baby!" Elle screamed at her sister.

"Elle, please don't call your sister names, and for the love of God, please stop yelling." Calleigh said in her calm voice. She was cleaning the kitchen for the many people who would be in and out of the house that week. It was hard to stay cool and collected. Tension had been at an all time high with the death of her father, and the girls had been fighting all day.

"God, mom, I guess I know who your favorite child is! You always take her side!" Elle said angrily, her southern accent thicker than her mother's.

"Oh, Come on Elle! You're just being a bitch because you're not getting your way!" Kelsey had to add that.

"Language!" Calleigh warned. "And I don't take sides. I'm just trying to do what's best for everyone."

"Really? You bought Piccasso for me to train for _her_. Because _she_ wanted a pretty little show horse! I spent a year on that horse and handed him over. That made the next horse mine. I chose the perfect horse, for _me_. Rata is wild and free and wonderful and he is going to take more than a year to train the way I want it done. Now, Piccasso is lame, because she was stupid with him and you want me to hand my baby over to her. I won't rush his progress just so she can hurt him too. She will just have to miss this show season."

"That's not fair! You don't even show, you just ride!" Kelsey whined.

"You both make good points. What if Kelsey rode Step?" Calleigh just wanted peace.

"NO!" Elle shouted.

"YES!" Kelsey countered.

"Why not?" Calleigh was getting upset by now.

"Because he is much older than Piccasso and Rata and she rides too hard, to soon. Did I not make that clear! When she decides to be a big girl and warm up properly, then she can ride my horses."

"Now you're just being dramatic!" Kelsey said smartly.

"You want dramatic!" Elle lunged for her sister and hit the table as Kelsey hid behind Calleigh, "Touch my horses, I'll beat you like a runaway slave!" With that, she took off to the barn.

"Mom?" Kelsey looked wide eyed at her mother.

"Honey, we're all on edge. We are fighting with each other because we are angry and sad and hurt over the loss of Grandpa. She'll cool down. She was closer to him than you were. You loved him and he loved you, but she never expressed the desire to meet her daddy like you did. The way she saw it, he was her dad. The end. But you, you always had a missing piece where you wanted your dad to be."

"I miss Pop too, you know."

"I know baby girl. I'm not saying you don't. You just miss him differently than she does. And that's okay. She's lost right now. She'll figure it out soon." Calleigh brushed her daughter's strawberry hair away from her face.

"I hope you're right. I want my sister back."

"I am right. Can you run and make sure the guest bathrooms are stocked? The one connecting to your room is for a friend of mine from Miami and the one joining mine is for grandma.

"Is Elle going to help?" Kelsey asked, outside she saw Elle riding through the trees at fast paced walk.

"Yeah, I'll go to tack up Kujo to get her and bring her home. Be good."

"Yes ma'am." Kelsey sighed. Although, she knew what she was going to do once alone. She would ride Rata, and be off before anyone was the wiser. Elle was just a worry-wart. Nothing would happen.


	7. The Funeral

Eric and Horatio walked through the small Shreveport airport until they found the baggage claim area. Eric went to call a cab while Horatio pulled their bags off the conveyor belt. A half an hour later, they were on a back road driving through areas of fields and woods. They were told it would only be about an hour's drive.

Eric watched the scenery. He could see what Calleigh saw in living here. It wasn't where she grew up, that held many painful memories. In contrast, it was nothing like Miami, which held demons that threatened to destroy her. He was starting to worry about having said anything to Horatio, let alone bringing him here. This was her thing. He would hate to lose her again because he had been stupid. They passed through a small town that looked like it belonged in a movie. It was so quaint and peaceful and safe; the complete opposite of Miami. It was the perfect place to raise a child.

Horatio couldn't stop the fears and regrets from running through his head. Calleigh had come to him out of fear, and undoubtedly shame. They had crossed a line and she was pregnant. Why had he been so quick to say what he had said? She carried his child for nine months, and despite what Eric had said, he knew she would have kept the child. An eternal reminder of what he had done to her that she would love nonetheless. She had wanted to tell him, but his words had hurt her and made her too afraid to say anything. Then he, being the ass that he was, never even looked for her. He had believed that is was her loss, her mistake; when, in reality, the loss was his. With all of his skills at finding people, he had deserted her. He left her out there, alone to raise the child he had implied was a mistake. She was so much stronger than he was.

They turned onto a dirt road that wound through the trees. As they continued, a house and a barn came into view. Then the road became a gravel driveway and the trees opened up to a lush, green yard. A huge yard. A dog bounded over and barked at the cab a few times before retreating to the porch. They followed the driveway to the house and saw a sweaty horse hooked to the hot walker, and another horse and rider walked up to the cab. The rider dismounted the spotted beast on the passenger side while the two men climbed out of the car. Eric came out on the passenger side only to come face to face with Calleigh beaming form ear to ear. She looked exactly the same.

"Eric!" She said excitedly and pulled him into a hug. She froze when she met the blue eyes staring at her from the other side of the car. She could hear Eric talking, but couldn't make out the words. Her mind was lost in that moment. She never thought this could happen. He hadn't cared fourteen years ago, why the hell was he here now? And Horatio just stood there, staring at her. She took a few breaths and stepped back from Eric. "If you would like to grab your bags, I'll show you to your room. One of you will have to sleep in on the floor, or the couch, because I wasn't expecting…um…" she fumbles over words, "the, uh…both of you." She turned back to the horse standing patiently behind her. Her forehead resting against the animal's, She was surprised that she had the strength to stand up.

Eric hauled the bags to the front porch while the taxi drove away.

"Calleigh?" she could feel him there. He was right behind her. She could feel his breath and the heat from his body. She couldn't look. He wasn't supposed to be here. She felt like she was suffocating.

"Don't. Just…please, don't." She managed to whisper. He backed up as Eric approached the two of them. Just then, a very loud crash was heard in the barn. They all jumped at the sound and Calleigh held the reins of her horse as he jumped backwards and reared his front hooves off the ground. Their eyes fell upon a massive chestnut horse running across the grass and easily jumped a fence near them. Calleigh let a bad word slip from her mouth and she threw the reins over her horse's head.

Before she could mount, a young woman who looked to be about seventeen materialized at her side screaming at the person following her. "How could you be so stupid?" She turned her attention to Calleigh, "I need to borrow Jo for a minute!" She mounted with speed and grace, which seemed like it should have been more difficult with lariat.

"What happened?" Calleigh looked worried and confused.

"Why don't you ask your bratty spawn!" the girl yelled as she nudged the horse and he jumped to life to chase down the loose horse.

"Kelsey?" Calleigh looked at the disheveled girl with big blue eyes. Horatio looked at her and knew she was his. He had a daughter.

"It's really a funny story, we're all going laugh about this later." She offered a weak smile that melted away with Calleigh's angry stare.

"You decided to use Elle's horse after I told you not to. And now look, she has to run him back over the fence to get him in to the barn. Go close the main gate, then make your way up to your room and stay there!" Calleigh's voice stayed low, but was harsh and cold.

"Yes ma'am." The girl was near tears as she ran towards the opening they had come through. Calleigh's eyes were trained on her until she entered the house. She smiled and turned back to her guests with a big smile. Her smile quickly faded when she saw Horatio looking at the house, like a puppy left out in the rain. She took a deep breath.

They once again had no time for words when they heard thundering hoof beats. "Easy Elle." Calleigh whispered.

The chestnut horse was running toward the fence with Calleigh's horse at its flank. The watched in wonder as the spotted horse gained ground on the red one. And even more shocking was when the rider of Calleigh's horse, grabbed hold of the red horse's mane and slid onto his back. Calleigh was holding her breath; she had not been expecting that. Soon, the red horse soared over the fence and a few strides later the spotted fellow did to. Kujo walked up to the small group and stood there, breathing heavily. They could hear soothing sounds coming from the girl as she rode the horse down. Slowly, his body collected and his pace slowed until he came to a walk. He then obeyed his rider's instructions and walked to the round pen near the barn and she slipped off and locked the gate. Calleigh hurried over, her horse close behind. The guys blindly followed.

"Elle!" Calleigh said to the fuming girl. She was hell-bent on heading for the house.

"I told her what would happen if she touched him. I gave her fair warning, now, she gets her ass kicked!"

"I need you to calm down."

"No, she could have hurt him! I could have lost him due to her selfishness! And you don't care! She's your precious little angel!" She looked to the house and yelled, "And now I'm gonna beat her like a runaway slave! I didn't grab this rope for nothin'!"

"No you aren't." She handed the reins to Elle, "Go un-tack him and put him on the hot-walker, and put Step away. I will go deal with her."

"What's she gonna lose? Primping privileges?" She grabbed the reins and clicked her tongue at the tired animal. He followed her across the yard.

"So," Calleigh sighed. "How about I get you two settled and then you can have yourselves a look around. Dinner will be at six thirty, but if you're not hungry, the kitchen is always open." Calleigh just prayed she didn't look as scared as she felt.

Horatio was watching the girl across the yard take the saddle off with ease. She scratched his neck for a minute, which he seemed to really enjoy. She quickly hooked him to the hot walker and un-hooked the buckskin and lead him into the barn. Elle, she looked like Calleigh, at least what he had seen of her, but she looked too mature, too old to be his. But he knew Kelsey was, and that was all he needed to know. Soon he noticed that Eric and Calleigh had gone into the house. He gathered his courage and walked over to the round-pen with the sweaty chestnut horse. He was going to try to gain insight to their little world. Elle had slid through the panels and was now inside sitting on the ground with her back to the house and everyone in the yard. The horse ran in circles around her, bucking and throwing his head around as he did so.

"She's pretty." Horatio couldn't believe the words had come out of his mouth.

"He." She corrected. "He's pretty. And thank you." She didn't move.

"That was amazing, what you did."

"It wasn't amazing, it was reckless. He is an amazing horse though. He has so much to learn, and works so hard at it."

"Wow. Who is training him?"

"Me. God, she could have hurt him. She never thinks things through." Her head dropped and her hand rubbed her forehead. The horse noticed her mood change from angry to sad and slowed down. Horatio nearly jumped the fence when he trotted straight toward her tiny form on the ground, but before he could react, the horse stopped. His nose dropped down and rested upon her head. He could see tiny sobs shake her, and her hand reached up to the animal's nose for comfort. He took that as his cue to leave.

"Eric, how could you bring him here?" Calleigh scolded.

"I thought you had told him you were pregnant! Plus, I didn't even know for sure! I'm so sorry Cal." He put his hands on her shoulders, making her face him.

"Eric, he never wanted me, or them, or this. I have raised my girls for almost fifteen years without him. What if he wants custody? What if he takes them away from me?" Calleigh tried hard not to cry, but the tears fell anyway. Eric pulled her close and let her cry.

"It's going to be okay."

"How? It hasn't been easy for us, but we got by. Everything is happening so suddenly. We are burying Daddy tomorrow. And now, H is here and he didn't even know about them. I've been hiding this from him for so long. They're my angels, I can't lose them too." She sobbed freely until she heard the familiar sound of her child coming down the stairs.

"Mom, I'm really sorry. Can I please come out of my room now?" She noticed her mother's tears, "Are you okay?" Kelsey's bright eyes shocked Eric. She was definitely Horatio's daughter.

"Yeah, I'm fine. You won't be riding horses until Piccasso is completely healed. You will also help Elle with his rehabilitation. And pull another stunt like today, you can kiss Ballet good-bye and say hello to working on the Johnson's chicken farm. Understood?"

Kelsey scrunched her nose and responded, "I understand."

"Good, now go apologize to Elle and help her with chores."

She nodded her head and bolted out of the house. On her way out the door, she slammed right into Horatio, who was just coming in. She offered a 'sorry sir' and continued on.

"You know, I think I need to take a shower." Eric announced as Horatio walked in.

"Yes. Do that Eric." Horatio had his eyes trained on Calleigh like a hawk with a rabbit in its sight. Eric slipped out of her grasp and ran up the stairs.

"How old is she?" He asked.

"Who?" Calleigh knew she shouldn't play innocent, but she really didn't want to have this conversation.

"You know who! Kelsey! The one who is 'your spawn'!" He raised his voice.

"Don't you dare raise your voice to me in my own house, Horatio!"

"Then tell me! Were you pregnant that day? Did you know?"

She looked away in shame, "That was why I had gone to talk to you, but you wished you could take it back and that it had never happened. How could I tell you I was pregnant after hearing that?"

"How could you not?"

"Because you didn't want us! You wanted Marisol! I was a mistake that you made; a lapse in judgment!" Her voice cracked, but she swallowed her tears back down. "You left in the middle of the night! No good-bye, no note, just an empty house. I felt like a worthless whore, used and then disposed of! You know, I actually checked my dresser for a tip? The next day you acted like it never happened! But it did, and I couldn't pretend it didn't. And then I found out I was pregnant, I couldn't hide that either. It was better to leave, to let you have your life remain the same. I'm sorry."

"You hid a child from me for fifteen years. I was robbed of her life. How fair was that?"

"Two children. Elle and Kelsey sisters. Sometimes it is hard to look at them because all I see is you. They have your eyes. Your hair. Kels has your smile."

"You had twins?"

"Kelsey was born seven hours before Elle, but Elle seems years older. They are mirror twins. Kelsey is a mirror image of Elle, well, everyone actually. Everything is on the opposite side than it is supposed to be…" Calleigh stopped herself from babbling on.

"I have two daughters?"

"They don't know who you are. They just lost their grandfather, please, leave this alone for now."

"That is an unfair request. But I will respect it." He stepped toward her and she took two steps back away from him. As if the very touch from him would shatter her. "I'm sorry, Calleigh."

She just shook her head and left the room to prepare for the rest of her family to arrive.


	8. Night Falls

The service was early in the afternoon. It had been agreed that he would be buried near Calleigh, since she was the one who had cared for him for so long. They all gathered in a small Baptist church in the center of town. Not many people came, just his immediate family, and a few of the tiny family's friends from town. Everyone's experience was different with Kenwall, but many people kept their speeches short. Horatio could only picture the man he had known back in Miami. He was just the drunk that caused Calleigh so much grief, yet she was always loyal to him. He was sitting far from Calleigh and the girls. His girls. How could he just go back to Florida and them stay here? He looked up when movement from that area caught his eye. Elle was walking to the front of the room. He looked back to Calleigh. She was trying so hard not to cry, while Kelsey was letting her tears run freely. He couldn't stop the vision of Calleigh, black dress, black veil, bright green eyes, and no tears from entering his mind. Could it really have been nearly twenty years since that had happened? It was so clear in his mind, like it was yesterday.

"Kenwall Duquesne was a man who left his impression on everyone he met, whether it be good or whether it be bad. A great lawyer in his younger years, he had a great deal of knowledge that he passed onto my sister, Kelsey, and me. Now, I'm not naïve, he hurt a lot of people, mostly people he loved. Mama's gonna kill me when she hears this, but, when I was eleven, Pop taught me how to drive our old pickup truck. We drove all over the west end of the property, and when we were both thoroughly sick of doing donuts in the mud, he confided in me. He said, 'I always want to be here for you and Kelsey. I wasn't there for my kids, and when I was, I was a horrible father. I would drink and get mean. Later, I followed your mom to Miami with every intention of doing better than I had done. But it didn't last long. I regret everything I did when I was younger. I swear to you, I will always be here for you and I will never be the man I was again.' I never met the man he spoke of. The man I knew was kind, and caring, and completely sober. He picked me up and dusted me off when I fell, which was often. He held me up when I felt like I couldn't stand on my own. He gave me strength I never knew I could possess. He taught me to ride a horse, and that horses can't talk, but they speak when you listen, so pay attention. And when I fall, I have to get back up; because falling is human nature. As a kid, I didn't realize these were life lessons. He was the greatest man I've ever known. I'm going to miss you Pop." Elle stayed calm and collected during her speech. Her voice never cracked, and tears never fell. She stepped away from the podium and walked back to her seat. Horatio watched her sitting there, still refusing to break.

He stayed away from the family, his family, during the graveside service. Kelsey had yet to stop crying, while Elle refused to cry. Even after Calleigh broke, Elle stayed strong. Calleigh sat with her brothers on the far side, Elle stood next to her with her hand on Calleigh's shoulder, and Kelsey was under her other arm crying in her shoulder. Even as the coffin was lowered into the ground and people were walking way, Elle didn't cry.

Everyone staying at Calleigh's house had ridden together to the funeral home, and after, they all loaded back up and went back to the house. Kelsey and Elle hurried into the house to set out all the food for the guests. The rest of the group came though the doors a few minutes later.

"Thank you, girls." Calleigh said when they were finished. They both nodded.

"How you doing?" Eric asked. Kelsey neared tears again, while Elle looked at him with somber eyes.

"I'm going to the box." Elle turned and walked out of the house.

Horatio looked at Calleigh, Kelsey's arms were wrapped tightly around her waist. Calleigh looked torn between her children. He assumed this had happened many times during their lives. When Horatio finally caught her eye, he motioned for her to meet him in the other room. He watched as she pulled out of Kelsey's grip and assured her that she would be right back. He followed her into the living room.

"What is it Horatio?" Calleigh asked. She looked exhausted.

"Where did Elle go?"

"There are two buildings, about one-hundred yards beyond the barn in the trees. I had them built for each of the girls for their thirteenth birthday. We call them boxes. It's so they both have a private place."

"Can I go talk to her?"

"No. Horatio, please, she's hurting. Don't make this worse."

"Calleigh, I won't tell her who I am until you tell me I can. You have your hands full here with Kelsey and everyone else. Elle shouldn't be alone, and you should be here."

Calleigh thought for a moment, before giving in. She hated his logic. "Go."

"Thank you!" He hurried out of the house and headed in the direction Calleigh had directed him.

He was glad that the girl's names were on their doors, otherwise he would have had to try them both, which wouldn't be a big deal, except they were about 70 yards apart and he was getting older. His joints were stiffer and he had less endurance. He slowly opened the door to a beautifully decorated room with a very full bookshelf, a lime-green lovesac, reading lamp, and a desk with a laptop set-up. She was playing music, but it was muffled. He ventured in to see that the other part of the building was a miniature firing range. Go figure. He looked and saw her change the song to something very upbeat before she rolled her shoulders and began firing her gun. She had her mother's skill with firearms. He didn't like the idea of her handling a gun at such a young age, but it could be worse. He could see Calleigh again in his mind. In the firearms lab. It was her happy place. He found himself so deep in thought that he hadn't noticed the music turn off, or the firing stop. She stood in the doorway between the reading area and the shooting area.

"What the hell do you want?" She asked harshly.

"I just wanted to tell you I'm so sorry for your loss. How are you doing?"

"Cut the bullshit. I may only be fourteen, but I'm not an idiot. You came and talked to me yesterday instead to going inside with my mother. You haven't taken your eyes off of Kelsey or me all day. You are from Miami." Her face remained neutral.

"So?" He didn't want to give anything away if she was leading to something different.

"So…You're the son-of-a-bitch who knocked up my mother." Her eyes met his, full of pain, hatred, and anger.

"You're a very smart young lady." He smiled at her.

"I get it solely from my mother. Looks, apparently from you, and brains from her. Why don't you just go back to Miami? We don't need you and we sure as hell don't want you here."

"I didn't know you even existed until I arrived here. But now that I do know, I think I have a right to know both of you."

"You mean, like you had the right to break my mother's heart. That kind of right? The right to hit when my mother is already hurting and Kelsey is vulnerable?"

"What about you?

"Don't worry about me. As far as I'm concerned, you're just a tick that needs to be disposed of before you take root and destroy us."

"That is not my intention…"

"I don't care about your intentions!" She yelled at him. "Don't talk to me about intentions. Don't you see how she looks at you? Her eyes hold a torment that can't be explained. It's a deep pain that she can't shake. You just being here, it hurts her inside. You may not intend to hurt her, but you do. Don't get me wrong, she is over you. But she's not over what you did. Not over the fear that you'll take us from her. And Kelsey, she's a confused girl who doesn't always think things through, and you will ruin her. You will tear our lives part without intending to do so. Just leave. If you can't leave quickly, a least stay away from my mother and my sister. They are off limits!" She closed the door to the mini-range turned the music back on, and up, and reloaded her weapon.

Horatio walked out of the building. He wasn't sure what to do. The things Elle had said made sense. He was so caught up in his own pity; he never once saw how Calleigh looked at him. For the first time since this journey began, he wished he didn't know about the girls. He wasn't quite sure what to do. So he did the only thing he could do… He headed back to the house and hoped the night would come quickly.

A/N: This will be my last update for a little while as I am traveling during spring break and won't have internet. Anyway, Read and review. I haven't written anything past this point, but I have some ideas and would love some input on where the story should go.


	9. A New Day

Night finally came. Calleigh said good-bye to all of her guests and thanked them for coming. Horatio and Eric headed up to their room, which was actually Elle's room. She had willingly given up her room; her mother never even had to ask. She had a twin sized bed, which Horatio slept in. Eric had insisted, as Horatio was older. The walls and doors were painted a deep navy color with an orange ceiling, window sills, and door frames and dark hard wood floors. Her window was broad and deep enough that the window sill was a built in bench. She didn't have much clutter in her room. Horatio assumed most of her things were out in her Box. Upon finding out that Eric would be sleeping on the floor, Elle had taken it upon herself to provide a somewhat cushioned mat and a few extra blankets for him to sleep on. To the immediate left of the entrance to the bedroom, was the door to the bathroom. On the opposite end of the wall was another door. This door led to a walk in closet that was shared by both girls.

Horatio could hear the girls in the bathroom, giggling as they got ready for bed. It was a magical sound. He knocked on the door, his toothbrush and toothpaste in hand.

"Come in!" One of the girls called. He turned the knob and walked in.

"Hi girls." He said with a smile.

"Hi." The girls said in unison.

"Do you mind if I brush my teeth?"

"Not at all!" Kelsey chirped.

"Whatever." Elle glared at him and spit the contents out of her mouth and left the room.

"Sorry about her. Today was really hard for her. She and Pop were really close." Kelsey said after she also spit.

"I understand. It was hard on all of you. How are you doing?"

"I don't know yet." She sighed and looked at him with bright green eyes. She opened the mirror medicine cabinet and pulled out five pill bottles and took pills from each one. She turned on the water, popped the pills in her mouth, cupped her hands under the faucet to gather water, and then lifted her hands to her mouth and swallowed it all down.

"What are those for?" Horatio was horrified to see her take so many pills.

"Some of my organs don't work quite right where they are, the meds help. And I get infections real easily so I am on high doses of immune builders. I've been on them all my life, so it's no big deal to me."

"Wow, that's a lot for a kid to go though."

"Elle's the one who has it tough. She has it tough by choice though. Ever since before we were born she's been lookin' out for me. It gets old sometimes, but I know it's because she cares."

"How did she look out for you before you were born? I mean, you were born before her, right?" He was a bit confused by her words.

"Yeah, I was, but Elle was supposed to be born first. Mom went into labor and Elle was ready to come out and join the world." She smiled a little.

"What happened?"

"They lost my heartbeat. Mom was crying. The doctors were talking about doing a C-section, but they wouldn't get to me in time. She basically had to choose, loose one child and allow one to be born or have the operation to try to save me and most likely lose both of us. Then, no one could explain what happened. Elle just says it was a 'twin thing.' Somehow, she and I switched places. The doctors said it was like she pushed me out. She's been very protective of me ever since."

"That's amazing." Horatio was in awe of his child, both of them really. "I've noticed, also, that she is protective of your mother…"

"That's a story for another day." She smiled and winked at him. "I have to get up early. I will be in my Box, I think mom already told you what that is, all morning getting it set up for our band practice. You should come hang out."

"Kelsey, I will do that." He smiled back at her. His blue eyes were slightly more moist than usual. She walked into her room, which he could see was decorated in pastels as opposed to Elle's bold ones. She closed the door behind her. He went about getting himself ready for bed.

Elle was just throwing her pillows to the head of her makeshift bed, which consisted of a thin blanket on the bright shag carpet of Kelsey's room and her denim quilt on top. Elle smile at her sister when she ran up and jumped on her bed, bobbing up and down with the springs.

"Elle, are you sure you don't want my bed? I'm more than happy to let you have it."

"I know Kels. I'm cool with the floor." Elle flipped her blanket back and got ready to crawl in bed.

"Elle?" Kelsey asked softly. Elle stopped and looked at her. "Could you sing to me?"

A huge smile took over Elle's face. She jumped took her turn jumping on Kelsey's twin sized bed. "Of course I will. It's been along time, huh?"

"Yeah. And today has been really hard." She blinked back tears. She didn't really want to cry again.

"Ok," Elle sat cross legged at the end of the bed and reached forward to grab the blanket and pulled it back. "Get in bed."

Kelsey scooted under the covers and rolled onto her side with the top half of her pillow under her head and her arms wrapped around the bottom half. "Ready!"

"Ok." Elle cleared her throat and rolled her shoulders before she began. When her mouth opened, the voice of an angel came out. No one would ever guess that the beautiful and gentle voice belonged to such a rough and tumble girl.

"Hey Monalisa, who was Leonardo?

Was he Andy Warhol?

Were you Marilyn Monroe

Hey Mozart, what kind of name is Amadeus

It's kinda like Elvis

You gotta die to be famous

I may not go down in history

I just want someone to remember me

I'll probably never hold a brush

That paints a masterpiece

Probably never find a pen

That writes a symphony

But if I will love then I will find," Eric was in the bathroom when Elle started singing. He wondered where she had gotten her voice. He had never heard either of her parents sing. He would bet money that it came from Calleigh. He could picture her singing to them as younger children. He silently got Horatio's attention and motioned for him to listen. Horatio had never heard anything more beautiful. His daughter was singing. He couldn't even tell her he was proud of her. All he could do was silently stand there and listen.

"That I have touched another life

And that's something

Something worth leaving behind

Hey Midas you say you have the magic touch

But even all that shiny stuff

Someday is gonna turn to dust

Hey Jesus it must have been some Sunday morning

In a blaze of glory

We're still tellin' your story

I may not go down in history

I just want someone to remember me

I'll probably never dream a dream

And watch it turn to gold

I know I'll never lose my life

To save another soul

But, if I will love then I will find

That I have touched another life

And that's something

Something worth leaving behind," Elle stood up and turned off the light. Kelsey groaned sleepily and stretched. Elle brushed her hair from her face and kissed her on the forehead.

"Hey sister, see the future that we're building

Mom's love lives on in the lives of her children

And that's something,

Something worth leaving behind."

"Elle?" Kelsey whispered.

" Hmm?"

"Are things ever gonna be okay again?" Horatio had risen and was preparing to head to bed when he heard the question. His heart sank.

"Hey, Kels, of course it will. We'll get through this. We always do. We always will."

"How do you know?"

"Twin thing."

"You always say that."

"Goodnight little sister."

"I'm older, Show some respect Junior!" Kelsey joked.

"Whatever." Elle slid under her top blanket and quickly fell asleep. Horatio made his way to bed. His night was filled with images of his girls. He could imagine their lives up to now. He wished he'd been there.


End file.
